The four lessons I’ve learned
Last week, in the first part of this post, I covered the context that prompted me to start thinking about the next step in my career. The past year has been an intense one for me, culminating in a major decision to resign from my position as a senior manager with my previous employer.
This week, I’m sharing with you the lessons I have learned along the way. Bear in mind these observations might be obvious to some, but less so to others. In this entry, I aim to reach out to the latter and perhaps refresh the memories of the more experienced among you.
1. Running scared is not your smartest move
Many of us, myself included, may tend to react quickly and instinctively to stressful circumstances. Some would argue there is nothing wrong with this, since all decisions need to be made from an individual point of view in a given context and period of time.
Over the years, however, I’ve noticed that this statement tends to be less relevant as your responsibilities increase, your network of partners and colleagues grows and the number of people and organizations who rely on you expands into the hundreds.
When you put only minimal thought into your actions, the messages you are conveying to the community about your value proposition and career path may be confusing. At the same time, with today’s technologies, any such messages are much more visible than ever. Don’t get me wrong: LinkedIn, Twitter, Facebook and the blogosphere at large are fantastic, but they can tear you apart if you don’t understand their impact and the power of the content they carry.
1st lesson learned: Do not run in the opposite direction out of sheer panic. Things might have been scary – very scary – for me this year, but I got much better at reflecting on my situation. So before I moved forward with my big career shift, I thought it over many times. After all, with some moves, there is no turning back…
2. Flattery will get you nowhere
Something odd always happens during an intense career decision-making period. All of a sudden, it seems like your phone calls and emails are all once-in-a-lifetime job opportunities from headhunters and others looking for an immediate reply.
Tempting, isn’t it, to jump on the first train going by? Whatever challenges or surprises they may possess, these opportunities inevitably seem like a dream job and a chance to escape the hassles of your current employment situation – which in my case included an impending second wave of a major restructuring operation.
A great friend of mine told me once:
“You can jump on and off these opportunities as they pop out into your face. But, frankly, opportunities are always there when you start to look for them. You’re better off doing your homework first and finding out what you want to do. Then YOU will be the one presenting opportunities to people you would like to work with.”
2nd lesson learned: It’s always flattering to get a call from someone who wants you badly. But are they really aware of what you are looking for? Is it the right time for you to discuss these possibilities? Have you already done your homework at your current job, so you know what you should be pursuing? Have you explored all your options at work? Or have you simply grumbled about it to yourself in your office, while your misgivings continue to fester in your mind?
3. Sounding boards are a precious asset
It is hard to explain the challenges you are facing to someone else. It is even harder to find the right people to explain them to! Discouragingly enough, politics are rampant at every level of every large organization. By this I mean unproductive politics, which derail people from their missions and companies from their goals, as some politics can obviously be positive and necessary for developing rewarding relationships over time and having a constructive influence within an organization.
When I tell someone that I am seeking out advice from others I trust at work, I always get an odd smile and awkward silence in return, followed by a comment like:
“Are you nuts ? Have you lost it?”“You can’t trust anyone, especially in the middle of a restructuring operation!”“If your boss hears about this, you’ll get fired!”“Last, week, I heard Bill say to Mary that Joan was about to…” And so on.
Well, risk and potential gain have to be balanced in any situation, right? The same applies to your sounding boards. Carefully select the people you consult, the level of detail you bring to the table, the type of subject you want to cover, and the expectations you attach to them. In the final analysis, avoiding this type of brainstorming for the sake of your own protection will probably do you more harm than good.
In last week’s blog, I mentioned that I had approached a couple of sounding boards within my circle of contacts. Together, they comprised a sort of “advisory committee,” although most of them were unaware of the presence of the others.
There were ten people on the “committee”: eight from Desjardins, and two from outside the organization. They were each given specific information based on our relationship and their own profile. And each served a different purpose when it came to the following types of information:
Cold, hard facts, available options, guidance and unwavering support
Three executives, including my boss
Reality check from an operational standpoint (the people doing the job on the field)
Four trusted colleagues (first-line managers and professionals)
Personal and professional advice from an impartial/ethical perspective
One senior HR advisor
Keeping my mind and heart focused and balanced during a tough decision-making process
One family member (my wife)
Big picture and overall insight
One impartial mentor from outside the organization
At this point, you may be rolling your eyes a little. “He couldn’t have talked to all those people,” you may think. Well, I did. A decision of this magnitude takes time. You can’t be in a hurry. But the next time I have such a stressful choice to make, you’d better believe I’ll take exactly the same approach.
You may wonder whether my “committee” ended up agreeing on a final, clear-cut choice. The answer is no: the final decision was mine and there was no consensus among the people I trusted. And, believe me, the path I opted for did not meet with widespread approval.
One reason my various sounding boards did not agree is that most did not know who else was advising me. Plus, they all had very different perspectives or interests with regard to the issues my team and I were facing.
3rd lesson learned: Asking for advice is a tricky balancing act between risk and reward. But you’re better off asking for guidance and support and making some mistakes along the way than avoiding it altogether out of fear and uncertainty. I’m no specialist in the art of consulting sounding boards, but I can tell you it made a heck of a difference in the decisions I’ve made this year.
4. Whether you stay or go, hold your head high
The end of this particular story is that I resigned from my job. But there have been many occasions in my career where the exact opposite happened and I went on for many years being highly motivated in a job I had once considered abandoning.
Most people are very conscientious about starting a new job. They make sure their message and their intentions are understood loud and clear. I agree that this is important: first impressions are crucial. But, on a side note, just make sure that these impressions are the ones you intend to deliver on a steady basis afterward. Once the honeymoon is over, your co-workers will expect you to honour your commitments.
Not as many people are as conscientious about leaving. This is unfortunate, because nothing can be more damaging to a career than setting the boat on fire before taking off with the last available life vest. Memories of this kind of behaviour will last far longer than any mishaps at the first impressions stage. In fact, the way I see things, these memories are likely to follow you and hinder your professional track record throughout your career.
Finally, even fewer people are careful with the way they deal with difficult situations at work while they are pondering their next career move. They tend to lose their temper easily and have no sense of subjectivity. They stray from their sounding boards, talk to the wrong people and end up losing the respect of their colleagues. And that’s only the beginning.
Take a moment to factor in two or three variables like the ones I’ve been describing about my own story this year. Now try to find one good reason that would’ve kept you sane under the same circumstances and prevented you from directing your frustration toward the people around you… or even taking out on your dogs! You can imagine that the first opportunity that comes your way, whatever it is, may seem like your ticket out of the nightmare. It’s tempting. I’ve had enough here… I’m running scared!
4th lesson learned: Times like these are a chance to invest in yourself. Hold your head high and consider the impacts of your actions. People will remember how you dealt with these situations and whether or not you did so with integrity. If you panic, they’ll remember the behaviour itself – not the reasons behind it.
True, life is short and you don’t want to spend half a year thinking about what you will do next, especially if you are already under heavy fire. But the market you work in is smaller than you think. People talk about you a lot more than you imagine. And now there’s social media to worry about, which can accentuate your visibility, for good or for bad!
In two weeks from now, I will share with you the work I did in order to support my decision-making process. That will be the third and last installment of my story of quitting a high-profile job… and why I’m happy with the way I handled 2010!
In the meantime, the following links may be of interest to you:
Analysts de la Région de Québec commencera l’année 2011 sous le thème de l’Agilité avec une conférence de 
